John Doe conquers the Stratosphere Las Vegas
October 5th 2007 04:56
Stratosphere Las Vegas – We went in boys and came out as men!
The day two Johns went on the ride from hell – John Doe Travelogue. #4
Introduction
Michael Myers wielding a bloody knife and chasing you down a deserted suburban street may get the pulse racing. Having Jaws rip your lower limbs from your upper torso would be agony. But absolute terror is reserved for the Stratosphere rides called Insanity and X-scream.
Located near the end of the Las Vegas strip, just up from the Hilton, The Stratosphere is the tallest observation tower in the USA. (Think Sydney’s Centrepoint tower.) Standing at 110 stories high, 1,149 feet some sick genius decided it would be cool to throw a few thrill rides up at 900 ft mark and two fools made the conscious decision to have a go.
Going Up? Look closely in the top left and you will see a small protruding arm, that is our ground zero
Ladies and Gentlemen X Scream
Originally the plan was to go skydiving in Elvis jumpsuits for the start of the bucks night but second guessing ourselves John Doe and John the first thought this attraction appeared to be close enough, we weren’t mistaken!
Awfully close to a suicide machine, John Doe and John the first meet at the base of the structure and nervously giggle at what lies ahead. Embarking into the turbo charged elevator (One of the fastest in the world) we shoot up the centre to the “Thrill rides level.”
First up is X-Scream, we are at 866 feet, the idea is we hop in a small 8 man carriage that sits on a runner. It rises and then fires us over the edge of the building stopping dead just short of killing us, the fun part is you then sit out there as if nothing is supporting your weight.
Now seems like a good time to mention Johnny D isn’t so keen on heights and this was being used as a tool to conquer his fears, it-did-not-work. In aid of painting a fair picture it is probably worth noting that JD&J1 are both seasoned rollercoaster veterans and hardened cynics of the theme park circuit.
Back to the horror, pulling J&J back into the confines we began, again plummeted out this time at a steeper angle and also the entire structure suddenly drops a couple of feet. Now is the time where the brain decides it is time to die or at least vacate the head that got it there.
A couple more times back and forth and then it was over, John Doe was a little shaky. Legs now like jelly, an anxious stomach questioning every step closer to our next objective, the aptly named Insanity.
Insanity please or a trip to around the Cuckoos nest
As the two Johns exchange a nervous glance and the girls (Nina and Gingersnap) videotape the event and see our obvious trepidation, peer pressure and the male ego are the only things that keep our legs moving.
JD again grips his bejesus bar (no not that one) and sits completely upright, rigid and unmoving…the goal is to just survive. This may sound like an exaggeration until JD explains exactly what it is Insanity does.
Insanity extends a metal arm 64 feet outside the main structure and then while seated in small 2 person, open air compartments the ride spins you on a wheel at up to 3G’s..how could that not be fun right? Did anyone mention that all this happens at over 900 feet? As the spinning increases the compartments naturally sway up forcing you to look down at the tiny, little people, transports and base of the tower.
Round and round and round it goes, Mr Doe’s life flashes before his eyes, so does the world below. The heart is pounding so hard that it may burst through the rib cage like Gieger’s Alien at any moment.
Everything has surreal edge, adrenalin is charging through the body, its an orgasmic collision of opposing emotions. This is the smartest dumb thing ever, paralysed panic causes an exciting rush so negative and positive events are occurring simultaneously. The mind left the building long ago and is just numb.
By the time it is all over we feel like the world has become a slightly different place since we left it just minutes earlier. Confidently Johnny D states that it’s the most frightened he has been in his supposedly adult life and possibly the most fulfilling. (Other than his wedding offcourse, which had only happened a day earlier.)
Final Thoughts
As the senses slowly return to normal the John’s realise they went to war with phobias that day and came back with a firm grasp of why they will continue to exist.
This was no simple ‘ride” it was truly an experience, the closest they would like to come to the grim reaper while living in peace and harmony.
For an entertaining read check out DuskDevis post on the ride HERE. Coincidently written about the same time I was actually doing it.
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